Basically you summed it up well and as usual, said things that most of of think but are afraid to actually say. Middle school buses are war zones today just as they were 40 years when I rode them. My bus driver back then was a tough old gal who knew how to shut us down. This poor lady should never been hired for a bus monitoring position and that's the basic problem. She didn't have the skill set to handle that job. I'm sure she feared going to work everyday knowing she didn't have the personality to handle such kids. Hope you survive todays bullying, Jeff, I think I hear em coming.

Robert,

Thanks! And not to worry. I'm already warming up the camcorder for my complete breakdown upon the first even slightly negative comment.

I'm gonna be rich!

Jeff

What it shows is that underneath the culture of corporate greed, political divisiveness and negativity spread by the news media, there is a population out there willing to help fellow humans, and willing to part with money in order to try to instill some form of fairness. The fact thqat the money grew to $600,000 just shows how compassionate people really are, and how important it is to the masses that fairness pervade in a culture of one-mindedness, in my opinion.

It should be cheered, as it shows that as a culture, the people are the hope for the future, and not the politicians, the investment banks, or the need for taxes- this was all done through private donations, if I read your article correctly.

Just imagine the problems we could tackle if we get politicians out of the way, and we pick ourselves up by our own bootstraps and begin the hard work.

Seems like if we can find $600,000 for her, we can do anything!

People use money to ease their concious.

I am glad someone said this out loud. Isn't the job of a bus monitor to keep order? I agree that no one deserves that kind of barrage (I taught junior high, and have seen how adolescents can behave - or not.), but wasn't stopping precisely that kind of behavior the reason she was on the bus?? Would she have stopped this crew of meanies from tormenting a fellow seventh grade passenger? Or was she, literally, along for the ride?

I, too, wondered what else could have been done with those contributions of cash. For instance, there is family from the district in which I used to teach, whose eighth grade son was hit by a car 17 weeks ago. He returns home this weekend, unaware of his parents, his two and three year old sisters, or his surroundings, with myriad meds, and a feeding tube. Recovery, whatever it may be, is a long, hard road for all of them. They need to equip their home, vehicles and lives to accommodate the tragedy that has happened to all of them. His mom can no longer work. She needs to take care of her son. (If you notice orange ribbons in the Downers, Woodridge, Darien area, they are there in support of this young family whose lives have been changed forever.) I wish that $600,000 had been donated to Hope for Hunter (There is a Facebook page that coordinates various fund raisers - and the heartfelt prayers of friends and strangers.)

I feel sorry for that bus monitor. Those kids are reprehensible. I just think that a little perspective might be in order.

My god, you do like to talk about yourself, don't you?

With such a large sum of money, she should go on vacation and keep a little to pay down a couple of bills. With the remianing large sum of money she should put it towards a charity that focuses on bullying.

Jen,

That would be the right thing to do!

Jeff

If I were a betting person I would bet all of Karen's money - even double or nothing - that you have failed in the most basic journalistic endeavor - you have never watched the entire 10 minutes. You are a little like Stephen Glass; you are committing journalistic malpractice. Watch/listen to the whole video. Come on - a little journalistic integrity please - Sit down with your wife and together watch the ENTIRE ten minutes. The boys obviously should have and could have been charged with elder abuse, stalking, (it was planned) threats of bodily harm. This isn't a little bullying. Go watch and imagine your wife daughter sister grandmother on a bus surrounded by these boys being poked and jabbed and threatened. Then get back to us.

Belle,

I've watched that video end to end three times. I've read virtually every major news account about it including the follow ups where two of the boys and two of the parents apologized. I've watched all the interviews with the bus monitor.

When left unchecked, this is exactly the kind of thing that happens on middle school busses. That's why they have bus monitors! There was a recent story out of Indiana about what some boys were doing to girls on the bus that makes this one pale in comparison.

As I watched the entire video, I couldn't help but thing why the person who's very job it is to stop this kind of thing did nothing to stop it. At 68 you really oughtta be able to stand up for yourself. Sadly, this kind of thing happens every day on school buses.

And in the grand scheme of mans brutality to man on this planet, there are some much more heinous things that we completely ignore.

Sometimes perspective is more important.

Jeff

Regarding Scott O'Grady, I cannot ignore your trashing someone who served our country and wore the uniform with pride. You were not there, in his cockpit, and there has been no evidence to conclude he "couldn’t correctly apply countermeasures and had to bail out". In fact, there have been official memos indicating the Serbs actually found a small flaw in the ECM pod carried in the F-16 at the time he was shot down.

You, sir, should stick to writing post-it notes!

I was watching a show the other day that profiled past lottery winners of large sums of money. Many of them had a similar experience. They said that the money didn't change them as much as it changed the people around them. Many people who were once their friends became resentful of them. Why should they have won that money and not them. What did they do to deserve such good fortune?. I bring this up because I wonder if Jeff would have written the same article if no one had collected any money for this women? Would Jeff have been so quick to come up with reasons why this women should not have been treated with such compassion by strangers. Would he really want to chalk it up as a an ill-equipped elderly woman who naively thought she could work with a group of kids who "when left to their own devices can be a rather nasty bunch" Without the money would this have been more an article about bullying and less a "blame the victim" piece? Just asking.

Thomas,

Ain't that kinda obvious? If no one collected money for this woman then there would be no column because there would have been no point to the column.

Jeff

So I guess my question is what was the point? We shouldn't feel bad for this woman because, through no solicitation on her part, people wanted to give her some money?
People who felt compassion for this woman enough to want to voluntarily give her some money are a bunch of idiots because it was this ladies own fault for getting a job where she should expect to be harassed and bullied? I am sorry Jeff maybe I am not as cynical as you are but I feel this story should make us want to applaud the better angels of our nature instead of trying top find fault with people who try to do the right thing.

Thomas,

You are certainly entitled to your opinion, but as some other readers pointed out, that money could've done so much more good than go to someone who hasn't figured out how to stand up for herself at 68 years of age.

If it were really our better angels and not just misplaced pity our guilt, we'd be giving our money to some of the causes some readers have already listed.

I simply can't understand why, when whole villages in Syria are being massacred, this is the story that captures our attention. So I have to wonder what that says about us.

Jeff

My guess is that it is much easier for people to feel compassion for someone or something that we can relate to, i.e. "that women could have been my mother or grandmother", or "I have witnessed or experienced firsthand "bus ride bullying" rather than something that is happening a continent away with a culture that is different from our own. It is why people get more upset about money being spent on possibly hiring an extra kindergarten teacher than the fact that Congress recently approved a billion dollar plus contract to build a fighter jet that the Pentagon has officially said it no longer needs.

Interesting read-I have been telling my husband (or anyone else that would listen:-), something similar since this story came out. On one hand, what those kids did was atrocious, and yes, they should be punished. On the other hand...despite how "easy" people think it sounds, not everyone is cut out to handle/monitor groups of children!

Again, I don't condone this behavior at all, but this woman was obviously not cut out for this job. What if the behavior was toward another student? Would she still just sit there? My guess is lots of inappropriate behavior was going on during these bus rides that was left unchecked. This is something to remember the next time someone thinks teachers make "easy money" .

-Kelly

So the basis of your tantrum is what? The woman didn't start the fund, someone else did. How do you turn this into a screed attacking the bus monitor? Was she supposed to know people were going to do this nice thing for her? And now you're angry with her?
Of course, Ward being Ward, he knows exactly how the situation should have been handled, and he knows the victim is to blame, and he knows she doesn't deserve even a moment of sympathy, let alone the money.
This is where you've sunk to, Ward?

I think we are ALL missing the point...the fact of the matter is these kids were wrong as was the bus monitor. The kids should not have done what they did and the bus monitor should have stood up for herself...end of story. My problem is this...if people are going to give her money, what lesson is being taught here? I think that is the road that Jeff was starting on with this one...the kids were wrong, the monitor was wrong, case closed. Yes it was a terrible thing that happened but the monitor had a voice right? She could have stood up for herself and did not. I have ridden on buses with kids who misbehave like that and all you have to do is stand your ground and tell them enough is enough. She could have had the driver stop the bus, she could have informed the driver who could have radioed it in...the options are endless but that is the problem...she did not use them. She allowed it to happen. So while I do sympathize with her, I also have to agree that if you don't stand up for yourself, you will be victimized. Coulda woulda shoulda fits quite well in this situation so let's at least hope the lesson was learned.

Kerri,

Exactly!

And those boys did walk away Scott free. They were suspended from the school for one year which ain't exactly small potatoes.

Jeff

Jeff, here is my own, personal take on this: Over the years, I've been unafraid to admonish the urchins when I've thougt it's been necessary. For instance, I've asked politely at a theater for them to please be a bit less rowdy or quiet. when they haven't done so, I've asked the management to solve the problem. It works.
However, in this instance, I can envision the scenario if the bus driver had stopped the bus and addressed the situation. How much would you wager that the parents when told,would have defended their darlings?

I submit that had the episode not been recorded, the punishment meted out would not have been as harsh. It had to take a viral video and the reaction of an outraged public to bring about the result.

Isn't that sad?