A Hinsdale divorced mother was finding little cover as she tried to navigate the emotional minefield of divorce. She was frustrated that she had neither a voice in post-divorce custody matters nor a safe haven in which to share her story.

She knew there were other parents like her, but she didn't know how to find them.

"There was no real place for people to connect," said Donna Grote. "I noticed in the community there wasn't any support group."

That's when Grote decided to take action. She joined the Children's Rights Council of Illinois, a grassroots, non-profit organization that promotes co-parenting solutions for divorced parents, and brought the group to Hinsdale.

Mike Doherty, chairman and co-founder of the CRC, led a Shared Parenting workshop for more than a dozen divorced parents in Hinsdale Monday, Oct. 25.  The workshop, said Doherty, is not only a place to let parents share their frustrations about ex-spouses, but also a venue to encourage them to help change Illinois family law.

The workshops and support groups are designed for non-custodial parents who often feel frustrated with a system that they say gives too much power to the custodial parent.

"These parents are crying out to maintain their bonds with their children," Doherty said. "There's an imbalance here, and they are the least represented."

Parents at the meeting were eager to discuss topics such as parenting time, shared legal custody and relocation. One divorced dad who asked not to be identified, said, "I'm not a victim, but I am!" Another parent said that even though he shares custody with his ex-wife, he has not seen his daughter in two months. 

The issue of child support was also discussed, and advocacy groups such as the CRC are looking to reform Illinois' law to be more like child support laws in other states.

"Illinois is one of the worst states in the country for child support," Doherty told the group.  "Most states have a shared income model, a formula by which both parents' income goes into determining how much child support is paid."

The CRC has invited state Rep. Patti Bellock (R-IL) to address the group at 7 p.m.  Dec. 14 at the Hinsdale Library about how parents should present their concerns to state legislators.

For more information about the Children's Rights Council of Illinois or any of its support groups, go to  www.meetup.com/Shared-Parenting-Illinois